At a Murder By Death concert in Fargo last week (they're a real band; you'll just have to trust me), I and all my fellow audience were treated to an additional two songs during the encore, because the lead singer felt bad that they'd never played a headlining show in North Dakota before.

Also in the past week, Iread a story in this Tribune about a man, Bob Stelbrink, who was motorcycling his way from Illinois and Alaska, and making a point of going through North Dakota, because it's one of only five states he hasn't been through.

It seems to be an all-too-common story. Anytime some person or entity wants to trek through all 50 states, North Dakota runs close to last in the order.

I'm someone who loves his home state, and were this land mass a conscient being capable of human emotions, I'm sure it would at least be aware of me. While Iwait for the state to talk to me, though, it concerns me that the world procrastinates their visits to this northernmost of Dakotas.

Geographically, it makes some sense, as we're kind of remote compared to a lot of areas. In the dead middle of the northern border of this fine country, it takes quite a bit of traveling to get to here from any destination that isn't Montana, Minnesota or that other Dakota.

However, flip that around on its head. No one has to travel the complete east-west width of the United States to get to us. We're safely in the middle for everyone. Nearly equal distance away from Oregon as we are from New England. How convenient is that?Why go all the way across this great land, when you can stop in the middle?

Also, if the continental U.S. were some sort of round, amorphous blob of a human being, lying face-up in the middle of North America, we in North Dakota would be close to where that blob's face would be on a creature without a neck.

We're the face of the United States. Go ahead and print that on the road maps, Department of Transportation. You have my blessing; Iwon't even charge you.

However, I will ask you to mark down the city of Wilton as "The storied childhood home of Kelly M. Hagen."Seems fair.

What Iwould like to have happen is someone turning this trend around. Idon't want to be the state that our entertainers remember only as part of the driving time from Missoula to Minneapolis. I want Green Day to play a show in Fargo because they want to, not because they need to in order to say they've toured all 50 states.

So, who's going to set this trend?Who will be the person who vows to eat a Whopper with cheese in every state this summer, and starts their journey at the Burger King in Dickinson?Which band will be bold enough to open their 50-state tour at the Bismarck Civic Center, instead of taking the coward's kick-off in Madison Square Garden?

All great journeys begin with a single thought. And where do thoughts come from?That magical space behind your face. And the face of these United States is the state of North Dakota.

(Columnist Kelly Hagen, marketing genius, can be reached at 250-8259 or kelly.hagen@;bismarcktribune.com.)